Cinderella

“All alone, in my own, little chair”, as I finish singing and proclaiming her favorite Cinderella song. Now why would a small fragile little six year old be singing this song? Especially around Thanksgiving time when she gets a break from her exciting coloring books from school and her recess days. Hi, I’m Abby and I’m pretty much more on the unique side of the family.I am tall and skinny, and everyone says I have cute little red freckles on her face with red hair. While the rest of her family was blonde hair, blue eyes.I have one brother and two gorgeous bigger sisters, which makes Abby the baby child. Therefore Abby was already feeling left out because of the circumstances she was born in, but who knew that six-year-old could feel depressed? When Abby thought things couldn’t get any worse her mother said that she had some great news for her and the rest of the family. So, they all met in the living room with the warm fireplace and the pumpkin scent filling the air, and their mother sat them all down so giddy and overjoyed with excitement. As soon as Theresa (Abby’s mom) was about to jump up and leap for joy again Abby’s sister Janet said “Mom what the heck? Would you just sit down and tell us already? Geez!” Everyone was already pretty excited about Thanksgiving being around the corner because the family always made a trip to Tennessee to visit all of their relatives. As soon as Theresa sat down she told the family that they should be expecting a baby anytime soon. Everyone gasped as if they had just seen someone die right in front of them. Jansen (Abby’s oldest sister) asked her mother when she was planning on telling everyone and their mother just stood there silently because no one was excited except her and Hitler (aka Abby’s father, but we’ll talk about him later).

A couple weeks before Thanksgiving my mother had the baby. I thought all was going to be fine and dandy until no one wanted to play with me anymore. I mean I am the baby. Why don’t I get treated like one anymore? What do I have to do to show people that I am cooler then this 6 pound 12 ounce little baby brat that’s stealing all the attention.Oh the things I would do to get all the attention back on me. I mean the little brat looks like an over sized rat. What’s the big deal about a baby anyways? Besides all of this new drama that is ruining my six year old life I have some exciting news. We’re leaving for Tennessee tomorrow and I’m super excited about seeing people that actually do love me or even care about me, but little did I know I was extremely wrong.
As soon as we arrived in Tennessee I leaped out of the car and greeted all of my favorite relatives, and I smelled the aroma of a fresh baked turkey in the oven calling my name. Besides the wonderful smell I finally felt like I was loved again and it felt great! I haven’t really felt like this since “he” came into the picture. “Where’s the baby,” everyone keeps shouting. I’m right here! They all laughed and pushed me aside and went to greet the 6 pound brat rat. Out of all the places in this world I thought I would be loved more around this time of the year because I am around a lot of family, but I guess when you’re not the baby anymore people don’t care for you or love you as much.So, the trip I was looking forward to with the horseback riding, hay climbing, good cooking, family fun, and people just loving me, but all of this came to a halt, all because of the brat. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I am only 6 years old for crying out loud! I am not supposed to be having feelings like this! “In my own little corner in my own little chair I can be whatever I want to be, I began to sing again.” This song just gives me a comfort that when no one else sees me I can act like a princess, a sailor, or even a “silkworm in Japan.”

As a maturing young adult I got used to not being the center of attention all the time, but now the problem was that I wasn’t even an idea in my house anymore. Between my younger toddler fart running around crying and my sister moving out entering her first year in college I wasn’t even on the list of things to do, so I sought out to seek the attention from others. As I grew up more my body started to mature and I looked like a better version (and cleaner) model of Lindsey Lohan. That’s when my dad began to put his foot down on everything. He had to know where I was going, who I was going to be with, what time I’m getting back, just stuff that shouldn’t even matter. Hitler bothered me so much that I started to rebel. He wouldn’t let me go anywhere or do anything, so I was basically locked in the house. When I got to high school I immediately started to get attention from guys and that’s when it all went downhill. My very first boyfriend Todd abused me and I gave him my precious gift and then he took it and stepped all over it like it was nothing special. That broke my heart, but I still wanted the attention no matter what it took. Theresa wasn’t giving it to me and neither was Hitler and I wanted it! So, I went to go seek another guy. Comes to find out I got sought out by one of my dad’s preacher friends, who molested me telling me that all of my pain was going to go away if I just did this one thing with him. To this day I will never step into his church again and my father “Hitler” didn’t even believe me. I was wounded by this situation and I told a friend about it, she invited me to her church and I began to hear the word of God and I just broke down into tears. I didn’t know that anyone could love me this much even when I was sinning and even if I turned my back on Him.

So, for all who is reading this just know that the only person, comfort, and love that you need comes from Jesus Christ. If you’re feeling down and unloved look for Him and He will always be there no matter what. Friends, family, and girlfriends/ boyfriends fade away but God will always and forever stay the same.